


Cactus Flower

by Amikotsu



Category: Naruto
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe - Western, Brothels, Cowboys & Cowgirls, Embarrassment, F/M, Legal Adults, M/M, Murderers, Naruto is Just Naruto, Near Death, Past Character Death, Past Relationship(s), Saloons, Second-Hand Embarrassment, Uchiha Obito-centric, Western, thieves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-16 01:21:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29445492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amikotsu/pseuds/Amikotsu
Summary: Obito hit the ground hard, the air leaving his lungs on impact, and rolled along the dirt until he came to a stop at the base of a large cactus. He heard the sound of hooves hitting the ground and the groan of wagon wheels, but the sounds eventually faded, swallowed by the desert. He rolled onto his back and shielded his face with a hand to keep the afternoon sun from hurting his stinging eyes. They’d taken everything but his underwear; they’d left him to die.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi & Mitarashi Anko, Hatake Kakashi/Uchiha Obito, Uchiha Obito & Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Obito & Yamanaka Ino, Uchiha Obito/Uzumaki Naruto
Comments: 10
Kudos: 21
Collections: Naruto AU Week 2021





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Cowboy/Western

Obito hit the ground hard, the air leaving his lungs on impact, and rolled along the dirt until he came to a stop at the base of a large cactus. He heard the sound of hooves hitting the ground and the groan of wagon wheels, but the sounds eventually faded, swallowed by the desert. He rolled onto his back and shielded his face with a hand to keep the afternoon sun from hurting his stinging eyes. They’d taken everything but his underwear; they’d left him to die. Groaning, he sat up enough to shift his weight onto his elbows and survey the area around him. They’d tossed his boots out of the wagon right after him, so he saw them several feet away, a rattlesnake already inspecting one boot as a possible home. Obito turned his head and spat, clearing the dust and grit from his mouth, then he pushed himself up into a seated position and felt along his right temple. He had a gash there, but it wasn’t too deep. He’d live. He had that kind of luck. 

The sun was unforgiving, and he didn’t see another place for miles. He looked up at the clear, blue sky and let out a string of cuss words nasty enough to make any decent woman blush, then he grabbed a tumbleweed and used it to force the rattlesnake from his left boot. Dressed in his red long johns, he looked comical, but he was hot as hell in the colored flannel, especially without his hat to protect his face. Obito bent down to tug his boots on, then he looked out toward the horizon. Every direction looked the same. The west stretched out in every direction, the earth baked and near barren, if it weren’t for shrubs, cacti, and tumbleweeds. He didn’t know the area well, and he knew that they’d picked the area knowing that he had little chance of finding his way back to the civilization. He didn’t think there was a town nearby, not within a day or two of riding, and even then, he had no horse. No food. No water. His dark eyes cut to the cactus at his back, but it wasn’t the kind he could drink from. Drinking from that particular cactus promised nothing but trouble. With every direction promising death, Obito brushed the dust off himself and started walking. 

Before nightfall, he’d made it halfway across the valley, but the heat and a lack of water had him stopping far too many times. He cursed Madara to the ends of the earth, and he kept walking, because he didn’t know how to die. It wasn’t the first time someone had crossed him and left him for dead, and he knew that it wouldn’t be the last. He still had the scars from the first attempt, the scars all along the right side of his body. Without his hat and the rest of his clothing, he felt naked, even with the long johns. People knew him just by the sight of his scars, and they knew to fear him, because a man who didn’t die by those wounds was a god of a man, or so the rumors said. The rumors kept people away from him, so he let them continue. Few people knew him by his birth name anymore: One person in his former gang, his cousin, Itachi, and the man who’d royally fucked him, his uncle, Madara, knew him before he was Tobi. He liked to pretend the time before Akatsuki didn’t exist. He was a nobody then. With his gang, he was somebody. Until Madara robbed him blind. All he had left were wanted posters and every sheriff within the country salivating at the thought of catching him. Without his gang, he was a nobody again. He was Obito again.

He fell to his knees near some prairie wattle and struggled to get to his feet again. By that point, he was half-scorched and half-frozen, the heat of the day quickly lost in the clear night. In the dark, with no moon overhead, he couldn’t see anything around him; with every step, he risked tangling with snakes. He finally gave up and lay on his stomach, head turned to the side so his cheek pressed into the dirt. He was tired and dying of thirst, and his body warned him that he didn’t have much time left. He swore he wasn’t going to be the type of guy to drink his own piss to survive, but he seriously considered being that guy. Just when he’d had his hands pressed to the earth, ready to try and push himself up to his hands and knees, he heard the sound of hooves meeting the dirt. Staying still, he turned his head and saw a tiny lantern slowly swaying in the night. His hand went to his right hip, but he didn’t have his twin pistols on him, so he grasped at air. Frowning, he put all of his energy into standing, then he swayed on his feet. His head spun and his vision swam, but he held firm and the lightheadedness passed. As the light drew closer to his location, he saw a young man riding a mahogany gelding. The man had a map open, looking as familiar with the area as Obito felt. But he saw a shotgun sticking out of the saddlebag and he knew he’d found his ticket out of there. It was a pity, because the guy wasn’t bad looking. It was nothing personal.

“Gee, I don’t know about this, Kurama. Seems like we’re pretty lost. Maybe we should have asked for directions back in Tea Country,” the man muttered, shaking his head at the map. With a sigh, he wrinkled the map up into a ball and stowed it away with the compass in the right saddlebag. It was a nice night, a little too crisp for his tastes, but it could have been worse. “Are you sure you saw them come this way? Empty for miles,” he spoke again, clearly finding comfort in his own voice. Obito felt the same way sometimes.

Obito crept along beside the horse, trying not to spook him, but he eventually had to step into the light when he grabbed the barrel of the shotgun. He didn’t expect to meet resistance. The man had the shotgun in his hands, ready to pull the trigger, so Obito scowled and released his hold on the barrel. They stared at one another for a long few minutes before the blond lowered the weapon and lightly patted the horse’s side. The animal must have alerted the rider, or maybe Obito had gotten rusty with his thievery. Obito’s eyes went from the lowered shotgun to the face of the man, and he found the most beautiful eyes he’d ever seen staring right back at him. On the man’s cheeks, he saw three whisker-like marks on each side, as if the man were some time of an animal himself. He looked too much like the famous sheriff Minato for it to be a coincidence. Obito had put that man six feet under ground nearly two decades ago. 

“You're that hot new sheriff out in Konoha. You’re a long way from home,” Obito noted, hands raised to show his palms to the blond. He got a nod in response, so he risked a step forward. The man had the gun raised and ready to fire, so he took a step back. “Trigger happy, aren’t you, sheriff?”

“You said it yourself. I’m a long way from home. I don’t know you from shit. Keep your distance,” he frowned. Obito looked from the gun to the horse, wondering if he could spook the animal enough to get it to buck. He thought he saw a canteen among the items in the saddlebag, and what might have been rations. At the thought, his stomach growled. “You aren’t dressed for a midnight stroll. Someone leave you out here?”

“You could say that. We, ah, _parted ways_.”

“They left you for dead.” The man lowered the shotgun again and began to root around in the saddlebag until he produced a single canteen. He leaned down to present the canteen, so Obito took a few slow steps forward and eagerly snatched it from his hands. “I’m Naruto. This is Kurama,” Naruto introduced himself, patting his horse’s side again. “You got a name?” His voice was rough, making him sound older than he looked. Hearing him speak at length had Obito pausing. In the light of the lantern, with his blond hair, Naruto looked like an angel. “You must be dumb or deaf,” Naruto sighed to himself.

“I’m not dumb or deaf. My name’s Obito.” Obito uncapped the canteen and greedily drank through a third of its contents. Water dribbled from the corners of his mouth and ran down his chin, right over his bobbing adam’s apple and into the red collar of his long johns. “Thanks,” he managed, barely swallowing the last bit of water in his mouth. He licked his lips, chasing the remnants. “If you’re heading back to Konoha, it’s about three days from Tea Country. I could show you where it is on that map.”

“So you were watching me,” Naruto said, his expression blank. Obito rubbed the back of his head, fingers brushing over dusty black hair. Naruto slowly moved to retrieve the map, but he kept his eyes on Obito. Again, Obito showed the blond his palms. “I can tell you this gun’s loaded and I know exactly how to use it. Keep your hands where I can see them and come forward.”

Obito rolled his eyes, but he followed Naruto’s instructions and took slow steps toward the horse. Obito took the wrinkled-up map Naruto extended and snorted at the ripped mess. He did his best to straighten the pages, then he draped them over the horse and began to point out landmarks. Naruto had come from Tea Country, which meant that Obito had likely been dumped somewhere in Tea Country, a foreign place for him. Naruto swore that he’d kept to the main road, but admitted to a few shortcuts, when asked directly, which put them somewhere in Fire Country. That helped both of them, because Obito had started out in Konoha. Once they found a landmark, they were set. Naruto accepted the wrinkled map from Obito and stared down at him with narrowed eyes. 

“You some kind of outlaw or something? Your face,” Naruto began, his mouth snapping shut. He reached up to lightly scratch his right cheek, nail passing over the whisker scars. Obito had been asked the question a lot, been called a lot worse names, so he shrugged his shoulders, choosing silence over a lie. Naruto began to adjust the saddlebags and moved back in the saddle, allowing more room up front. “Sorry about this, buddy, but it looks like you’re going to carry two of us now, alright? I’ll treat you real good when we get back to Konoha, dattebayo!”

Obito looked around the dark desert around them, then at the space on the saddle. Naruto arched a brow at him, silent, expectant, so Obito sighed and took the offered hand to get on the horse. Naruto smelled like lemongrass and something fruity, likely from dried fruit easily found at general stores. Naruto clicked his tongue twice and moved the reins, then Kurama exhaled and began a slow walk. Naruto looked to either side, searching for something in the dark, so Obito reached around him to retrieve the map. Together, they plotted a path through the night, neither man talking about anything beyond the journey. By first daylight, Naruto was practically vibrating, because they saw the first signs of Konoha in the green trees of the oasis. 

"Look at that, dattebayo! We're almost home, Kurama!"

"He can see that, Naruto."

"It's almost like there's someone raining on our parade, boy."

"How old are you anyway?"

"Nineteen this fall. You got something against that? I can leave you to walk the rest of the way," Naruto said, warm breath tickling the back of Obito’s neck. Obito hummed, as if considering the idea, then he took the reins and gave them a little snap to get the horse going. "Hmph. That's what I thought." Naruto slumped forward and rested his chin on Obito’s right shoulder, "I guess you'll want to get out of here pretty fast. Where will you go?"

Obito turned his head a little to see messy blonde hair. He didn't know where to begin with his search, but Amegakure seemed like the best bet, followed by the northern territories. The north was full of religious fanatics and outlaws looking for safe haven amongst them. Orochimaru was one of them. The man was a cross between the two, except he worshipped science and experimented on people. He killed more than he saved. Still, Obito had once made a spot for him in Akatsuki. If they'd gotten along better, maybe the man would have stayed; if the man had left Itachi alone, maybe Obito wouldn't have tossed him out in Hell's Gate. Rumor was that Orochimaru survived by eating his own flesh and drinking his own blood, but foreigners liked to make up the wildest stories.

"Swamps, more than likely. I plan on finding the people that left me for dead and making it even," Obito admitted, giving just enough information to answer the question. There were swamps across the east sea that could have qualified, and he didn't think Naruto actually cared where he went. He was wrong, of course. Naruto cared too much about the wrong kind of people. "You plan on coming with me, sheriff?"

"Depends on who these guys are. Former sheriff's the mayor now. He can handle things, if it's worth my time," Naruto shrugged, sitting up again. By that point, they could already taste the drinks served at the saloon. They were minutes away from Konoha. 

"You mean Kakashi?" Obito frowned, eyes scanning the town for any signs of Kakashi’s silver hair. He didn't see the man, but that didn't make him feel any better. He and Kakashi went way back. They were childhood friends, until he went bad; Kakashi swore to bring him in, dead or alive. That had been almost twenty years ago. He'd been outrunning Kakashi ever since. He hadn't heard about Kakashi’s retirement; he'd assumed the man had died on the job.

"Yeah. You got something against my mentor?"

"More like he's got something against me, kid."

"So you are some kind of outlaw."

"I'm the biggest outlaw you'll ever meet. You should have left me to the rattlesnakes." He didn't have to turn to know that Naruto was frowning. When they hit the edge of the town, Obito gave a light tug on the reins and Kurama came to a stop. Before Naruto could protest, Obito hopped down and presented the reins back to Naruto. "Thanks for the ride, gorgeous." Obito flashed him a grin, one that pulled on the scars on the right side of his face, then he cut through the back of the town.

"Hey! If I hear you stole something, I'm throwing away the key!"

"I can't hear you!"


	2. Chapter 2

Obito stood outside of the general store, his eyes focused on a side hanging from the closed double doors. Back in ten minutes. If he had a hat on his head, he might have thrown it on the ground in frustration. The name on the glass read _Might General_ , and he knew without a doubt that Gai had likely taken over for his deceased father. Obito gave the handles a shake but the doors were locked. He had no money for clothes, no money for supplies, no money for a stiff drink; Obito stepped off the porch and dropped down on the edge, taking a seat on the creaky wood. Overhead, the morning sun promised another day of burning heat. He waited ten minutes, the sunlight reminding him of the passing time, then he got to his aching feet and walked in the direction of Ichiraku's. He could smell the cooked pork from outside. 

He pushed open the swinging doors and looked around the empty saloon. There was one person seated at the bar and a couple of men playing blackjack in the far corner. The owner, Teuchi, did a double-take when he saw Obito. The man had gotten old, so old that his young daughter had grown into a pretty young woman. When she saw her father's face, Ayame turned toward the door and gasped. Without missing a beat, she pulled out an old shotgun from behind the bar, feeling the weight of it in her hands. He was infamous, so he wasn't insulted by the gesture. The other three inhabitants of the saloon looked over at him and one of the blackjack players started to snicker, until his friend kicked him hard under the table. 

"Don't you laugh now! That's Tobi. He'll shoot your ass before you can blink. Fastest draw out there."

Obito smirked at them and made his way to the bar. Ayame made a show of nudging her father aside to stand in front of him. He leaned forward to tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear and she narrowed her eyes at him. 

"Don't be so hard on me. It's your old friend, Obito."

"No friend of mine! My friend wouldn't run off in the night to join some gang."

"To be fair, I ran it."

"You got ten seconds to get your slimy ass out of here before I pump you full of bullets."

Obito frowned at her, but he slid off the stool he was sitting on and glanced at the swinging doors. The sheriff's warning echoed in his mind. He reached forward, disarmed her, and removed the shells from the gun in one swift movement, then he handed the gun back to her. She stared at him with wide eyes, then swung the gun around to try and smack him over the head. He jerked his head to the side and her swing nearly took out the man seated to his right. The man, content to sip his whiskey, shouted in alarm and ducked, allowing the butt of the gun to sail over his head. 

"Troublesome," the man muttered. He dropped some loose ryo onto the wood bartop, grabbed his hat, and slid off his stool. Teuchi was left to call out to the man, but the Nara lifted a hand in a lazy wave and strolled out into the morning sun. Ayame turned her narrowed gaze back to Obito. 

"I wasn't going to let you knock me out, if that's what you expected. Maybe you should be careful where you're swinging that thing."

"Good morning!"

Naruto interrupted the two with his sunny greeting and Ayame quickly stowed the gun away to greet him with a bright smile. Obito barely contained the urge to roll his eyes. The game of blackjack quickly disappeared, along with the chips atop the small, round table. Gambling wasn't allowed in Konoha, not since the third mayor outlawed it thirty years ago. The sheriff looked from Teuchi and Ayame to Obito and his sunny smile slowly slipped away. 

"He starting trouble?"

"Why do you think it's me? She tried to knock me out!"

"'cause I'd expect trouble from you, Mr. Outlaw."

"He's right. Ayame got a little carried away," Teuchi admitted, looking between the two with a nervous smile. Naruto's mouth opened, but he closed it with a huff and sat down on Obito’s left. "The usual, my favorite customer?"

"Make it two!" Naruto tapped his hands on the bar, then jabbed a thumb in Obito’s direction. When Naruto smiled at him, he felt guilty for ever considering robbing and killing him or his friends. "Two glasses of water too! Keep them coming, Nee-chan!" Ayame pinched his right cheek and he blushed and ducked his head. 

"Something else I owe you then?"

"You won't be getting very far on looks here. People take ryo, not your smoldering eyes."

"Smoldering? Hm. Since we're at it, how about some decent clothes and a horse?"

"Don't press your luck."

In a few minutes, Obito had a large glass of cool water and a big bowl of ramen. He alternated between eating and drinking, forgoing table manners to fill his hungry stomach and quench his thirst. Naruto started out watching him, but quickly saw enough of his lack of manners. Oddly enough, Naruto lacked them himself. Obito was in no place to judge, and he was more focused on his own food and drink. Ayame scolded Naruto a few times but he'd just smile apologetically and go right back to slurping noodles. Obito stopped at two bowls, while Naruto went for four, then they both focused on their water to chase the salty broth. Obito owed the young sheriff a little too much for his tastes, but he always settled his debts.

"I guess you're going to wander around in your underwear then, huh?"

"I'm not taking them off."

"Come on. Let's find you some clothes and that'll be the end of my hospitality. What you choose to do next is on you."

The Might General Store still wasn’t open, the same sign hanging from both door handles, but they passed by with no hesitation. Obito surveyed the small town from his youth and found that more buildings had popped up, but the roots remained the same. Where there were two inns, the village had replaced one inn with a brothel, indicating that miners must have returned to the town. They’d struck gold years ago, drained the mines, and left, but the brothel indicated new blood and new lines. Silver was a big-ticket item, so there could have been silver. Konoha was the only town near the Hokage mountains, so every miner in the mountains eventually made his way into town. Obito made a note to ask about the mines, mostly because he wasn’t above robbing them blind. 

He expected to see Kakashi outside the mayor’s office, but the building was dark and the doors were closed. The courthouse portion of the building only operated once a month, since judges traveled through Fire Country from town to town. That explained the larger jailhouse. Naruto had stopped, so Obito ran right into his back. Naruto stumbled forward two steps, then he turned and arched a brow at Obito, so Obito turned his head and began to whistle an innocent tune. It took him a minute for his curiosity to catch up, then he looked in the direction that the blond was looking. They stood outside of the swinging doors leading into the brothel, and the blond looked more than a little furious. Without waiting for Obito to say anything, Naruto blew through the swinging doors and marched into the establishment, his cowboy boots hitting hard on the wood floors. Obito barely caught the man’s hat that had fallen from his head. He wasn’t above a trip to the brothel, so he didn’t complain once they’d entered the front room. A buxom blonde greeted them, but her sexy little smirk turned to an irritated scowl once she saw that the guest was the sheriff.

“Naruto, what are you doing here? Kakashi comes here for a good time,” the woman said, rolling her eyes. Obito thought he recognized her signature blonde hair and blue eyes. She looked too much like Inoichi, marking her as a Yamanaka. Her large chest was on display as she leaned over the counter to glare at Naruto, so Obito followed the line from her lips to her breasts. “Well, at least someone looks interested. Who’s your friend?”

“Huh? Hey! We’re not here for that!” Naruto turned his angry eyes on Obito and waved his arms, disrupting Obito’s view of her breasts. With a snort, Obito stuffed the cowboy hat down onto Naruto’s head and gave it a firm twist. “I left the town in his care. Why is the jail empty? I told him there were coach robbers near the mountain pass! Judge comes to town in a week and we’ve got nothing to—hey! Ino! Don’t just walk away from me! I’m the damn sheriff now, dattebayo!”

“She respects the law. Maybe I should go after her,” Obito suggested, already sliding his way around Naruto to follow Ino deeper into the brothel. The next room had plush couches and an old piano in the corner, where one woman was perched on a man’s leg, her lips pressed close to his ear, her hand sliding up and down his thigh. Ino turned and saw Obito and her eyes held a spark that he’d seen the moment she first saw him, so he tried to straighten his clothes.

“No way! Uh uh!” Naruto walked right past Obito and approached the man at the piano. When he flipped the hat off of the man, Obito recognized the floppy silver hair and his interest in Ino evaporated. He didn’t have the money for a good time anyway, and he didn’t think Naruto was that good of a guy. “Where are the coach robbers? What about the charlatans slinking through on their way to the capital? You’ve just been looking at pornography and playing with Anko this whole time!”

“Maa, a man has many needs, Naruto,” Kakashi said, looping an arm around the smirking girl perched on his lap. Kakashi’s eyes strayed from Naruto and he locked eyes with Obito. The relaxed expression on his face turned sharp, and they both glared at one another. Anko, sensing the rising hostility, slowly got off his lap and joined Ino, both of them watching the exchange with interest. Kakashi’s hand went to his pistols, “I didn’t think you’d show your face around here again. Didn’t you make it big out west?”

“The swamps only hold so much for a man. A man has many needs, after all, Bakashi,” Obito fired back, his scowl turning into a taunting smirk. Kakashi made to shoot and Obito grabbed the pistol from Naruto’s rip hip and aimed. Their bullets missed, and they both knew they hadn’t been trying to hit one another. Still, they remained armed, fingers on their triggers. “Didn’t think you’d clean up your act. Last I heard, you were flirting with disaster, filling the sheriff’s seat your mentor finally vacated. So where is the old bastard?”

“Dead. You know that.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Naruto, why in the world are you walking around with this guy? Don’t you read the bingo books? A sheriff should memorize every page. Don’t you listen to your old teacher, my cute little monster?” Kakashi’s eyes never left Obito, but Obito swore they shifted for the briefest of moments in between blinks. Kakashi had an ugly scar stretching over his left eye. Obito remembered the ones responsible for that scar. They’d been the first ones he’d ever killed, and that taste for blood took him far and wide.

“O’course I read the bingo books! You’re in there. I’m in there,” Naruto began to list, counting off on his fingers. Kakashi sighed, a long, drawn-out sound that ended Naruto’s listing. “You saying this guy’s in the bingo book?” Naruto looked between them. He’d been inching closer and closer to Obito in a slow attempt at regaining his pistol. Obito switched to his left hand to keep the gun farther from Naruto. “I don’t remember his face on any of the wanted pictures.”

“He’s the leader of the most notorious gang there is, Akatsuki.”

“ _Former_ leader of the Akatsuki. I’m pretty sure I was ousted the moment they left me for dead in Tea Country.”

“Such a shame. This is why you don’t pick up riffraff, Naruto.”

Obito sneered at Kakashi and Kakashi narrowed his eyes, pressing down a little more on the triggers, just enough for Obito to notice. He had a feeling the next shots wouldn’t miss. Naruto finally took a daring jump to stand in front of Obito and pried the gun from his hand. Without much of a fight, Obito relinquished the pistol and leaned to the side to continue glaring at Kakashi. At one time, they’d had something good, but that was a long time ago. He, Kakashi, and Rin had been inseparable, and then Rin had been murdered and their complicated friendship became a mixture of violence and romance that he couldn’t quite forget and swore he’d never regret. Things changed. People changed. There was nothing left between them but fire and hurt feelings. Obito missed all of what Naruto had said, but when the blond turned to face Kakashi, he tuned back into the conversation. 

“So what’re these guys up to then? Just your typical bad guys?”

“You name it, they’re involved in it. The former mayor in Suna? They killed him. The settling of the northern territories? They’re behind it. They rob banks, they free crooks,” Kakashi began, trying to educate a disbelieving Naruto. At the end, Naruto turned squinted eyes onto Obito and looked him over from head to toe.

“This guy? He’s just running around in his underwear,” Naruto said, jabbing a thumb in Obito’s direction. Irritated, Obito let out a huff and turned his head away. Some people were dense, and then there was Naruto’s level of dense. To prove a point, he chopped Naruto in the back of the neck, swiped the gun again, and swept the legs out from under the teen. “Gah! What the hell, Obito!” Naruto rubbed his aching back, but he didn’t get to his feet again. Obito gave the gun a little twirl and tested the weight of it in his hand. He missed his twin pistols.

“Sorry, Naruto, but it looks like this is where we part ways,” Obito said, taking slow steps toward the doorway. Naruto scrambled to his feet and went to pursue him, but Obito shook his head and fired a warning shot at the teen’s feet. “Where I’m going, you don’t want to be. Thanks for saving my ass. Nice seeing you again, Bakashi. Do me a favor and drop dead.” With that, he turned and fled.


End file.
